Grad School Gratitude

Hello, friends. It's been four years or so since I've stopped by my blog to do a little writing. That's because I've been working hard to complete a Master of Divinity degree from Abilene Christian University, an endeavor that left little time for my own writing. I had the honor of walking across the stage in Wildcat Stadium on the campus of ACU this evening to receive my degree, and I'm ready to get back to sharing my heart through this blog. And I want to start with a post of gratitude for many of the people who helped me successfully complete my life-changing journey through grad school.

A little over four years ago, I asked my husband to pray with me, to discern whether grad school was a good option for me. When we agreed that it was something I should do, I jumped in with both feet and experienced God's confirmation of our decision time after time. Several months later, I was elbow-deep in study and loving it.

Dr. Mindi Thompson, who has since become a dear friend, gave me my first perfect score on a major assignment, which was then followed by the same from Dr. Curt Niccum. (I blame them for my drive for perfection for the next three and a half years!) They taught me many things that first summer about the literature of the Bible and about how to interpret it well, but they also taught me that I was a capable, that I was intelligent, and that I had the grit and determination to tackle grad school with excellence. Dr. Wes Crawford honed my writing skills and made me believe that I had true ability. Dr. Paavo Tucker encouraged me to relax the expectations I had of myself, to give myself permission to "miss a dot and tittle" every now and then (he was my first Hebrew prof), because expecting constant perfection was no way to be an effective minister. Dr. Tim Sensing encouraged me to be creative with my approach to ministry, knowing that it is a challenging field for a woman to enter. I could go on and on about each of my professors who invested in me, believed in me, encouraged me, challenged me, and made me a better person, Christ-follower and minister. I owe so very much to them.

And then there are the friends I made along the way. Women like Kerri and Nancy who inspire me and make me so glad to have studied alongside them and that I get to call them friends even though we all live in different states. Women who have cried with me, prayed with me, celebrated with me. I will love them always.

But really more than anything, I owe a deep debt of gratitude to some very important people a little closer to home. 

 

To my husband, Scott, and my children: Thank you. Thank you for the thousand different ways you supported me through this experience. Thank you for cheering me on, listening to me ramble on about whatever subject I was studying (Scott particularly loved it when I talked about St. Ignatius of Loyola... 😂), helping me practice Hebrew and Greek vocabulary, letting me hide away on paper-writing or test-taking days, and sacrificing time and attention that should have been yours but went to my studies instead. You have been my biggest cheerleaders - especially you, Scott - and I couldn't have finished without your support.

And then there's my friend and mentor, Daren, without whom I never would've even thought about grad school. He saw possibility in me long before anyone else did, and he invested so much time and heart into forming me into a person who was worthy of God's calling into ministry. And now I have the privilege of working alongside both him and our friend Kevin as we pour ourselves out on behalf of the Crossroads CC congregation. I couldn't ask for a better team of pastors to work with, and they both have encouraged and supported me in countless ways.  Daren: thank you for seeing my potential, for pushing me to think harder and feel deeper, to love and be loved more than I thought possible, and to see people through the eyes of Jesus. Kevin: thank you for your constant encouragement and for seeing the best in me. Thank you for your leadership and your always-open door.

Today was a bittersweet day, as I took my family on a tour of campus and watched them enjoy the campus of ACU almost as much as I did. My heart ached just a little to know that I probably won't be back to study within those walls, at least not in the foreseeable future. And then the ceremonies that had to happen online instead of in person because Covid-19 happened. I got to see the beautiful faces of so many that I had studied with at some point during the last four years, but there were no hugs, no shoulder-to-shoulder as we celebrated together. I felt the sweetness of hearing that my instructors chose to honor me with a leadership award because they saw strength and promise in who I am and the kind of minister I am becoming, but again... no handshakes, no embracing the women and men who helped me grow into who I am.

But the day ended with that glorious - and sweltering hot - experience of the graduation. Of actually walking across the stage, hearing my name spoken and seeing my picture on the jumbo-tron, and finally being able to say I have a master's degree. There were some loved ones who couldn't make the trip to Abilene, and they were sorely missed, but the ones who could come made it the most special of experiences for me. It was a sticky-hot evening, but it was good, and it was one that will be long remembered with fondness. 

 

I know that to some, finishing grad school doesn't seem like that big of a deal, but friends let me tell you: these last four years have changed me. They have formed me in countless ways. They were four of the most difficult, exhausting, exciting, and full years I have ever experienced. I can't say that I loved every minute, or even every class, but I wouldn't trade a moment of it. I'm so very grateful that God called me into this journey, that He led me to ACU, and that he sustained me through the process. 

And I am so excited to wake up tomorrow, and the next day, and - God willing - the next, and see what new journey He has mapped out for me now.